The problem with enterprise AI mandates isn't that they're wrong — it's that they land on engineering teams as velocity pressure, not transformation blueprints, and the evidence is starting to show. Picture the slide. Somewhere, a Chief AI Officer is presenting to a board of directors. The deck has gradients. There's a roadmap. The words "AI-native" appear four times in as many slides. The projected productivity uplift is ambitious and, critically, uncited. The board nods. Budgets get ap...