I wanted to see how far modern coding agents could go on a language that almost nobody uses. So I picked UmLang , an esoteric programming language created years ago from a Korean internet meme, and asked Codex to port Pikachu Volleyball . The surprising part was that it actually completed the project (roughly 41 hours of work). After that, I benchmarked multiple implementations using headless simulation throughput (graphics/audio disabled). Results: Native Rust Original JavaScr...